


Bingo Square A1

by DramamineOnTopOfMe



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Spideypool Bingo 2019, hidden identity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-28 01:24:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20055766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DramamineOnTopOfMe/pseuds/DramamineOnTopOfMe
Summary: Continuation of my photography fic, Bingo Square E3. It can be read as a standalone.Wade's thoughts on Peter, and the progression of their relationship since he found out about the Twitter account.





	Bingo Square A1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to counterdogma for betaing for me on this and teaching me so much about the English language that I feel like I wasn't taught right in school.   
White is in bold and Yellow is in italics.

“What do you mean you ‘accidentally’ put a bullet in him, Wade? You can’t  _ accidentally _ shoot someone!” 

“Yes, you can, friendly fire!” 

“You weren’t being friendly!” 

_ {Friendly Neighborhood Spidey?}  _

**{No you dumb fuck, that’s Peter!}**

_ {You know, he sounds a lot like Spider-Man…} _

**{Just because they have the same snark doesn’t mean they’re the same person!} **

“Shut up, Yellow,” Wade huffs under his breath.

Peter cocks his head to the side and hums. “Yellow being an asshole?” 

“No, you just sound like Spider-Man. You’ve got the same snark, makes him think you’re the same person.” 

Peter smiles. “He’s from Queens, right? Probably something in the water.” 

Wade nods, then asks, “How are you so cool with the boxes, by the way? Everyone I’ve ever met besides my spider-babe has run for the hills after hearing about them.” 

“I don’t scare easily, you see where I live,” Peter looks around his apartment, emphasizing that he lives in a shithole. 

Wade pulls up his mask a little farther on his face, settling it perfectly on the bridge of his nose. Then he takes another bite of the burrito in his gloved hands. 

“I can get you out of here.” Wade swallows. “I have a few safehouses that never get used. You could stay in one if you wanted?” 

“Why would I do that? I like living here. There are muggers everywhere and I’m more likely to get shot on my way to the bus than I am to be hit by a car.”

_ {There’s that snark again! Are we sure he’s not Spider-Man?}  _

**{Jesus Christ! Spider-Man is not the only sassy person on the planet!} **

* * *

Peter asks, “Can we get tacos?” Wade looks over at his friend, happy that the other man is comfortable enough to lounge around. 

“We’ve had tacos every single time I’ve eaten with you, don’t you eat anything else?” 

“Tacos are one of my favorites, next to pancakes and hot chocolate. I can’t afford tacos, though. So I want them every time you come over.” 

Wade stares at the smaller man, taking him in. He notices for the first time that Peter is, in fact, nearly skin and bone. Does he not eat when Wade’s not around? 

Wade clears his throat, “Sure, baby boy-”  **{Hey, dumb fuck, we like him. Don’t scare him off.} “** Uh, Peter. You want taco truck tacos or restaurant tacos?” 

Peter’s eyes narrow, “Why’d you correct yourself? What’s the matter, Wade?” 

“Nothing you just-- you don’t like me, so I should stop with the pet names.” 

“I don’t mind your names, dude. They don’t bother me at all.” Then he taps his chin for a few seconds, pondering. “And I want taco truck tacos.”

* * *

“So, do you take pictures for your job?” Wade asks a few nights later. They are eating pancakes and watching Golden Girls. 

“No, it’s mostly a free thing,” Peter shoves his feet a little further into the cushion while he talks, “I was taking pictures of Spider-Man for a hot minute and gave them to the Bugle. But then I saw the articles they were writing and told them to fuck off. I don’t know who the new guy is.” Then he takes a bite of his pancakes. 

“Have you met him? Or did you just stalk and take pictures from afar?” Wade teases lightly, putting an arm around the back of the couch. 

He looks up at Wade and smiles around his mouthful of pancakes, “No, the stalking was just for you.” Wade chokes slightly, causing Peter to grin, “I’ve met him, but it was because I got in the way and he didn’t want me to die.”

“Well, I can assure you that my spidey-babe is really nice! And he’s got the best ass in New York, hands down!” 

Peter and Wade continue eating their pancakes on the couch, the sounds of Blanche and Rose bickering in the background. 

Wade looks down at Peter, silently watching him finish his food. He’s pretty, skin soft and glowing. 

**{He’ll never like you, you’ve got open blisters and sandpaper for skin.}**

_ {He’d be fun to fuck though!}  _

**{He already said he doesn’t like us, and he definitely won’t let us near him when he figures out that we look like a used diaper underneath here.} **

Wade sucks in a breath and shakes his head. The noise causes Peter to lift his head. “You okay?” 

“Yeah, the boxes are being loud. Sorry, Petey.” Peter nods, scooting over so he’s brushing up against Wade’s side, “Be nice to Wade, he probably doesn’t deserve whatever you’re saying to him.” He directs his words at the boxes. 

_ {Did he just talk to US?} _

**{What the fuck?}**

Peter suddenly stands to move the empty plates to the sink, and Wade gets an eyeful of his ass. 

_ {Oh dear sweet Jesus, he’s got Spidey’s ass, let’s fuck it! I want our tongue on his tight little hole!} _

“You have the same ass as him! Are you sure you’re not Spider-Man?” 

Peter smirks, sticking his butt out slightly and turning his head, “Does it look like I stick to walls, Wade?” He can’t hide it, the signature Spider-Man snark. 

* * *

This job is going by slower than Wade anticipated. It’s a lot of recons, and not a lot of actual killing. While hidden in some underbrush on his stomach, he’s popping between listening to the boxes sing All-Star at each other and thinking about Peter. 

_ {WELL THE YEARS START COMING AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING}  _

**{FED TO THE RULES AND I’LL HIT THE GROUND RUNNING! DIDN’T MAKE SENSE NOT TO LIVE FOR FUN} **

Peter and Spider-Man are so similar! They’ve got the same humor and the same laugh! They both love tacos too! 

_ {YOUR BRAIN GETS SMART BUT YOU HEAD GETS DUMB; SO MUCH TO DO SO MUCH TO SEE SO WHAT’S WRONG WITH TAKING THE BACK SEAT}  _

**{YOU’LL NEVER KNOW IF YOU DON’T GO}**

The sound of the boxes singing keeps Wade from his thoughts. He can’t focus when they scream in his ears for an hour straight. 

“Guys quit it, I need to think.” 

_ {GO!}  _

**{YOU’LL NEVER SHINE IF YOU DON’T GLOW!} **

_ {GLOW!}  _

** _{HEY NOW, YOU’RE AN ALLSTAR GET YOUR GAME ON GO PLAY! HEY NOW YOU’RE A ROCKSTAR GET THE SHOW ON GET PAID!}_ **

Peter and Spider-Man are nearly the same person sometimes. Nevermind the size, they’ve got the same personality and Yellow swears they’re always the same person. 

_ {AND ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD! ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOLD!}  _

**{AND ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOOOLD! ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK THE MOOOLD!} **

_ {That was fantastic, should we go again?}  _

“No, you’ve been singing the same song for at least an hour. Lay off for a second and help me.” 

**{Why would we help you? You’re pathetic.} **

“Okay, explain to me why Peter and Spidey are so similar. They have the same ass--” Wade stands begins to pace because the boxes have been nothing but annoying. 

_ {It’s a delicious ass, too.}  _

He taps his chin, “Same ass, and they’ve got the same snarky attitude! Did they go to school together or something? Did Spider-Man teach him how to be snarky when Peter was taking pictures of him?” 

**{Did he really meet Spider-Man? Or was he just taking really well-timed shots of himself while in the Spidey suit?} **

That idea catches Wade off guard. What if Spider-Man and Peter are the same person? 

_ {Don’t forget that Peter seemed to have no problem accepting us, we’re part of you after all.}  _

**{Yeah, it’s like he already knew. The only person that knows is-} **

“Spider-Man! You’re right! He was so comfortable with you guys that night that he talked directly to you!” 

**{Have you figured it out yet?} **

“Peter Parker  _ is _ Spider-Man!” 

**{Ding ding ding! Someone’s using their brain today!} **

  
  


It’s been two weeks since they last saw each other because Wade’s been on a job out of town. When he comes back, they have dinner at Peter’s.

As soon as Peter opens his apartment door, Wade asks, “Hey, Petey, before we start this mukbang, can I use your little boy’s room?” 

“Sure thing, Wade. It’s the door to the left.” Wade saunters over to the bathroom, mentally preparing himself for the conversation he’s going to have with Peter during dinner. He’s decided that he’s going to talk about Spider-Man. 

Wade flushes the toilet without using it but washes his gloves anyways.

**{What? They’ve gotta be clean sometimes! Come on, readers! Get it together!} **

Without hesitation, He sticks a finger under the door of the medicine cabinet in the mirror and pulls. What goodies does Peter have hiding in here? Maybe a few condoms? A pile of pills to explain why he’s so chipper all the time? 

Unexpectedly, a red and blue fabric falls out of the mirror. 

He picks it up, holding it up against the door. 

_ {Spider-Man’s suit!}  _

**{You can talk to him now, avocado fuckface.} **

_ {I can’t believe that Peter and Spidey are the same person!} _

_ { _ ** _Can’t you though? Didn’t we literally decide this a week ago?}_ **

_ {Yeah, but dipshit here’s an idiot, who actually thought he was right?}  _

He quickly exits the bathroom, forgetting to put the suit back in the cabinet. Once in the living room, Wade sits on the couch and spreads his legs out on the floor in front of him. “Sorry, Petey gotta make room for the knees. They crack if I don’t spread them out.” 

Peter just laughs and sits down on the other end, his knees coming up so he can rest his chin on them. “So what do we want to watch? I’ve got a few movies. Otherwise, we could just see what’s on?” 

“Let’s see what’s on.” Wade moves his shoulders back and forth mutely, trying to crack his back. “I don’t think you want to spend two and a half hours with me ranting about Star Wars.” His back cracks and he sighs, “That’s better.” 

“We could watch it. I have the original three? I mean, I don’t have anything going on for the rest of the night, I don’t know if you want to patrol or something later.” Peter blushes. and plays with the hem of his shirt. 

**{Why’s he blushing?}**

_ {It’s like he wants to spend time with us?}  _

**{No way, Wade’s face makes grown men scream. A cutie like this wouldn’t want to spend more time with us than necessary.} **

“Of course, Peter, I can stay for a while! Put it in!” 

Peter smirks, getting up to put in the DVD.“I’m gonna powder my nose really fast while this loads.” 

Wade nods, eyes never leaving the TV. 

Peter gasps, not yet in the bathroom. “You okay, Petey?” Wade leans forward, finally taking his eyes off the screen. 

No response. 

**{Maybe he died?} **

_ {Did we put away the suit?}  _

“Shit.” 

**{Way to go, fuckface, now he knows we know!} **

_ {Weren’t you going to tell him anyway?}  _

**{No!} **

“No, I wasn’t,” Wade whispers lowly.

Peter staggers away from the bathroom and puts a hand against the wall to brace himself. His breathing is rough. 

“Pete? You okay?” Peter’s shoulders are slumped, and he looks small. 

“Shit Wade, I--” His face crumples, breathing picking up. 

Wade’s complete attention is on him now, “What’s wrong?” 

“My suit. I left it out on the sink, I was gonna-- I didn’t-- I wanted to tell you!” Peter begins to hyperventilate. 

“I took the suit out, Peter.” Wade shrugs, “I was snooping through your stuff as a normal person would.” Shaking his head, he says, “That’s a really weird place to put it, by the way. Didn’t you know someone was going to poke around in there?” Wade pauses, taking in how panicked Peter is, and his voice lowers, “I thought I stuck it back in there, I’m sorry.”

“But you weren’t going to say anything?” His eyes meet Wade’s, he looks terrified. “You aren’t going to tell anyone?” 

_ {He’s guilty! He’s totally guilty!} _

**{Or he’s scared, use our brain, Yellow!} **

“Hell no,” Wade said reassuringly. Peter’s shoulders sag slightly at the words, “It’s your secret, I wanted you to tell me when you were ready. I’ve known about Spidey for a few weeks.”

Peter drums his fingers on the wall a few times, anxiety getting the best of him. The drumming becomes more frequent, and Wade can’t focus on anything else. Then he starts to pace, abandoning the wall. But he stomps a few steps, then quietly walks the other way. He repeats this three times before speaking again, “You weren’t supposed to find out like this. It was supposed to be better! I thought— I thought that—” Peter’s voice cracks as tears flood his eyes. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay babe, I’m not upset!” Wade’s off the couch and at his side before he’s even thought about moving. Softly, he says, “Everything is fine on my end. I’m sorry I scared you with the suit. It wasn’t my intention.” But Peter still looks so scared, “I mean it, Peter. I’m not going to tell. You don’t have to worry about it, I promise.” 

“I couldn’t go out as Spider-Man, not— not with how school went last year. I— I thought I could just keep an eye on you, as me.” Peter flails, his left arm hitting the wall accidentally. He heaves a breath, “Maybe show up during Christmas when I had a break, I don’t know! But— but then everything got all messed up!” Peter’s voice rises, and he hits his fist against the wall again. 

“If I— if I hadn’t started that freaking instagram— you’d never have known! I was just meant to be stalking you awkwardly, keeping an eye on you! But no, I had to put it up on the internet!” He’s full-on yelling now, tears streaming down his face. Wade reaches a hand forward carefully, he doesn’t want to spook him now. “Then you saw me and, and we started talking and I just— I didn’t know how to tell you!” He hiccups a few times, and slides down the wall, crumpling to the floor in a ball. 

Instagram is what started all of this, he remembers. One day Wade had opened his phone and saw that a post with him in it had gone viral.

_ {Remember when we found out that he’s in college? That was a good time!} _

**{What are you talking about? Seriously, what the hell are you talking about? Are you rambling because Peter’s freaking out? Try fucking listening to him!}**

_ {Jesus, no need to yell, dirtbag.}  _

Wade follows him down but doesn’t touch. Peter’s sobbing still, snot leaking from his nose. He can’t believe Peter feels like this, and it’s his fault. He left out the suit, all of this could have been avoided had he put the suit back! “You didn’t know how to tell me?” 

“I-- I didn’t think I  _ could _ tell you! I thought you’d get mad, and Yellow and White would freak out!” He wipes a hand across his face, attempting to wipe away the tears and snot. 

“Come here, Petey.” Wade opens his arms, waving Peter over. He nearly trips over himself to get to Wade. “I’m not mad, okay? But if you want to keep your secret, you really need to tone down the sass. It’s kind of a dead giveaway.”

Once Peter gets close enough, Wade wraps his arms around him and squeezes tightly. “You did what you needed to do to get through college. I can’t be mad at you for that.” 

“But I didn’t tell you who I was--” 

“You weren’t planning on getting caught, and your secret is yours, not ours. It’s okay, Peter, I promise.” Wade leans down and places a light kiss on the top of Peter’s hair. 

Peter sighs, then pulls his arms out from between their chests. They come up to wrap around Wade’s neck. 

“Okay, fine.” He’s quiet. 

**{You can’t be okay with this. He lied to us.}**

Wade’s hands secure themselves tighter around Peter’s tiny waist in response to White.

“Guys, be nice to him. He’s doing his best.” Peter mumbles, face smooshed in Wade’s chest. 

**{There he goes, talking to us again!}**

_ {Maybe he’s got a point?}  _

Suddenly, Peter pulls his face away and jumps, wrapping his legs around Wade’s waist and pressing his face into his neck. 

** _{What is he doing?!} _ **

Wade adjusts his hold, left arm hooking under Peter’s butt for support, “Baby boy?” He asks quietly, careful not to spook the man in his arms.

“Thank you for taking it so well.” Peter sniffles quietly and Wade can feel the wetness on his neck.

“Baby boy, it’s okay. You don’t need to cry,” Peter takes a small breath with his words, beginning to calm down. 

Wade pets his hair softly, whispering, “Everything’s okay, baby boy. I promise you’re alright. Hidden identities are hidden for a reason,” A small whimper comes from his neck, “Pete, you’re okay. We’re okay.” 

Peter clings harder to Wade, “I’m sorry.” 

Wade sighs and walks them both to the couch, Peter straddling his muscular hips. “It’s okay, Peter, I promise.” 

They sit for a few minutes, Peter slowly calming down. He moves his face every few seconds, nuzzling slightly into Wade’s neck. 

“Pete,” Wade sighs again, fingers gripping his hair a little, “That tickles, baby boy.” 

Peter pulls his head from the crook of Wade’s neck and looks at him, eyelashes wet and cheeks damp with tears. 

“I’m sorry, Wade,” his voice soft. 

“No no, honey don’t be. It’s okay, honestly.” Wade’s large hands swipe across his face, drying the moisture, then he cradles Peter’s face. Peter keeps his eyes on Wade’s as he cocks his head a little to the left, leaning into the hand.

**{Kiss him.}**

_ {Oh my god, look at that face. KISS HIM!}  _

Wade leans forward, giving Peter enough time to back away if he wants. But he doesn’t move. Instead, he closes his eyes and waits.

Peter’s reaction renders the boxes speechless, leaving them with benign reactions. 

_ {He’s going to let you kiss him!}  _

**{Better do it before he changes his mind.}**

Wade presses their mouths together in a chaste kiss. Peter whimpers, causing Wade to pull him a little closer so that their chests press together. 

He opens his mouth slightly, slipping his tongue over Peter’s bottom lip. Then he pulls it back in, thinking he’s going too fast.

Peter whimpers again. He presses a hand on top of Wade’s pec. 

Pulling back, Wade mumbles, “We can figure this out, Peter. It’s gonna be alright.” 

“Yeah?” He nuzzles Wade’s neck once. 

“Yeah, we can talk about it later. Right now we’re going to finish this movie. Sound good, spider-baby?” Peter nods and climbs off of him. He readjusts, curling into Wade’s side. Wade smiles at the action and throws his arm around him.

  
  



End file.
